During this first week of November, I have been reflecting on a few life-changing spiritual events that occurred in my life in early November: my baptism, my confirmation and the commencement of my missionary service.

On Friday, November 5, 1982, I was baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Two days later on Sunday November 7, I was confirmed and received the gift of the Holy Ghost in a sacrament meeting. Here are a couple of pictures of my baptism — the first one is of my dad (Kent) and grandma (Dick); the second is of my immediate family on that exciting day back in 1982:

I remember that baptism day very well. I wanted to make sure we performed the ordinance correctly so it wouldn’t have to be repeated. My dad and I were both dressed in white and we rehearsed in another room just before the actual baptism. The water felt very warm and comfortable. After my dad offered the prayer, he immersed my 8-year-old body completely under the water for just a short moment. As I came up out of the water, I felt clean and pure. I made a personal goal at that time that I would never sin again!

While I was unable to keep that goal, it was the beginning of a spiritual journey that led me to missionary service for the Church 11 years later.  On November 3, 1993, I entered the Missionary Training Center in Provo, Utah to prepare for two years of service as a church missionary in Sao Paulo, Brazil. Here’s a picture of my MTC district in front of the Provo Temple (I’m on the far left side):

These events shaped my young life profoundly. My baptism put me on a path of church activity and participation that eventually led me to missionary service. On my mission, I taught the gospel to hundreds of Brazilians and, in the process, became ever-more converted to its truths. My love for and devotion to the Church were cemented during this formative time in my life, for which I am deeply grateful.

Today, I turn 35 years old. When I was a boy, that seemed very old. Someday, I’m sure it will seem very young. But for now, it feels just right.

Over the past three Sundays, my kids and I have been watching home videos from years past. They get a kick out of seeing themselves as babies and toddlers. We just watched a video from 2004, way back when I was 30 years old. I haven’t changed much in those five years besides gaining and losing weight (and then gaining and losing it again a couple of times). However, my children have changed a lot. Check out these pictures:

Fall 2004

Fall 2009

Aren’t they cute? My, how they’ve grown!

As I ponder my life, I really do feel 35 years old! I feel like a real adult. I have a wonderful wife who has stood by my side through a dozen years of marriage. I have  two boys, two girls, two cats, a dog, two green cars — a minivan and a Toyota Camry who, between them, have more than 400,000 miles on their odometers. I have owned my first house in Riverton since 2000.

I am the sole breadwinner for five people who depend on me for financial support, as well as emotional support, love, teaching, discipline, etc. I have served as a counselor in the bishopric of my ward for nearly three and a half years, and have had several other callings in the church that have given me great leadership experience and opportunities for service. From 2005 to 2007, I earned an MBA from the University of Utah, and last year I changed careers from marketing / corporate communications to business development / commercial lending.

Yes, I do indeed feel 35 years old. I continue to struggle keeping the weight off since my body thinks it needs the extra storage around the middle in preparation for winter/famine. I can’t stay awake during movies any more, and frequently fall asleep on the sofa around 10:00. I have to wear contact lenses or my vision is blurred. I listen to talk radio and NPR while driving instead of FM music stations, and I know more about popular music from the 90’s than the music from… whatever we’re calling the decade that we’re currently in.

I have a subscription to the Readers’ Digest and to the Deseret News, although I did allow my subscription to the National Geographic to expire. Once or twice I have worn dark socks with shorts, and I confess that I sometimes wear pajama pants and sweatshirts to the grocery store as I pick up my diet soda. I am physically able to grow a decent looking beard, though I seldom have the excuse to do so.

The previous paragraph perhaps makes me sound like I’m older than my 35 years. But 35 is still young. Thankfully, I don’t have much joint or back pain and can run, hike, swim or play tennis and recover fairly quickly. I haven’t been to the doctor in years (though I probably should). I contribute to a 401(K) plan at work, but I don’t pay much attention to the numbers since retirement is at least another lifetime away for me. My hair is just as thick and full as it was when I was in high school and shows no signs receding. I do see an occasional white hair on my head, but it’s more of a curiosity than a cause for concern. My energy level and zest for life are better than ever.

So I’m older than I’ve ever been (I guess we can all say that), but I am content to be where I am. I think that’s the key to happy living. Enjoy the moment you’re in NOW. You can look back at the past with fondness and nostalgia and look forward to exciting things in the future, but if you don’t enjoy the present, you’re not fully living. So I embrace my 35 years and look forward to the next 35!

Last month Robin and I celebrated our 12th anniversary and so we decided to take a trip without the kids to San Francisco and the Bay area. Over the past several years, we have tried to have a couples vacation at some point during the year and it’s been very fun. We’ve been on two cruises — one to San Diego, Catalina Island and Ensenada and the other to Miami, Key West and Cozumel. We have also been to San Antonio, Las Vegas and last year we went to New York. We’ve also done some local stays at Little America and the Armstrong Mansion in SLC, the Silver Lake Lodge in Park City and the Homestead in Midway. Thanks to wonderful grandparents, relatives and friends who are willing to help with child care, we have been able to do some fun things together as a couple.

This most recent trip was a blast; here’s a quick summary:

Oakland Temple Grounds and Visitor Center – very beautiful and peaceful; amazing views of the Bay Area.

Berkeley Campus – very busy; didn’t stay long.

Muir Woods – amazing old growth Redwood forest not far from the city.

Stinson Beach – nice views with a fun drive coming and going.

Wicked – excellent musical with great sets, costumes and special effects, a good plot, wonderful acting and singing (note to self: get more sleep the night before; I struggled to stay awake)

Alcatraz – fantastic tour of this famous island/prison; cell house audio tour was a highlight.

Chinatown – lots of fun shopping and dining experiences.

Coit Tower – amazing views of the Bay Area.

Streets – 45 degree angle streets were certainly fun to drive; and a little bit scary.

Ghiradelli Square – lots of tasty, overpriced chocolate.

Fizherman’s Wharf – charming and fun place for a stroll; lots of energy and movement.

The Franciscan Restaurant – excellent food with impressive views of the bay from their wall of glass.

Golden Gate Park – huge park with lots to see and do.

China Camp State Park – old Chinese fishing village; fun to learn about shrimp fishing in the 1800s.

Bodega Bay – beach town where they filmed Alfred Hitchcock’s “The Birds.”

Coast Drive – craggy rocks, crashing waves, very beautiful.

Sonoma Valley – vineyards that go on for miles; charming towns.

We kept the cost of the entire trip to less than $1,000 thanks to a travel voucher from Delta that we earned last year on our trip to New York. It was a great three days to spend together sans kids/distractions. It makes me more grateful for my sweet wife.

Here are some photos:

Two weeks ago, I finally gave into and bought an iPhone 3G. I have been wanting one ever since Apple introduced the product in June 2007. But when I realized I could get a refurbished 8 GB 3G for $49 and that the monthly service plan would be discounted by 20% because of my company’s relationship with AT&T, I could resist no longer.

I had very high expectations for this phone and so far it has met or exceeded nearly all of those expectations. I love it. It is a life-changing technology. Just like the DVR which gives users so much more control over their TV viewing, the iPhone revolutionizes the way users access and manage data and entertainment. It is fantastic. For example, the maps feature was invaluable on our recent trip to San Francisco. It helped us know where we were at all times and how to get to where we wanted to go. That feature has already proven very valuable for me as I search for clients’ addresses. I’m working to convert my contacts, calendar and To Do lists over to the phone so I have a quick, searchable way to find important information. The apps I’ve downloaded are very useful and the core functions (iPod, phone and internet / email device) are wonderful.

Two downsides:  the battery life isn’t as good as I had hoped. However, after doing some research, I found out that using the 3G network to download data really eats up the battery charge. So I’ve made a few modifications to how I use the phone. I still have to charge it every night, but that’s because I’m a “power user” and use it a lot. The other struggle is managing my minutes. I selected a plan that was as affordable as possible, but it’s required me to modify my phone usage a bit. I have 900 anytime minutes and unlimited calling on nights and weekends. But with Cricket, my old provider, I had unlimited talk time and I used at least 1500 minutes in a month. I’ve coped with that situation by simply using a landline instead of my cell phone if one is available. And I do look at my online minutes usage record every few days to make sure I’m on track not to exceed my limits. So far I’m doing okay. 

In other news, Robin and I finally decided to buy a bedroom set after 12 years of marriage. We’ve been sleeping on a frame queen bed we inherited from my grandmother and have never had a matching set of furniture. Robin recently received a bit of inheritance money from her grandparents and we decided that instead of frittering it away on small stuff, we’d focus on some larger-ticket items, like this:

It arrives today and we’re excited. We hope that it won’t look too big for our master bedroom, which isn’t huge. We bought a second nightstand, recognizing that it probably won’t fit in the room. We’ll use it when we get a larger house. We would have liked a king bed, but again, we have limited space in the room. And we’ll still be using the same queen mattress and box springs, so no pillow-top mattress for us just yet. All in good time.

Robin also got some new pots and pans for the kitchen and some new light fixtures for the upstairs rooms. A small spending spree doesn’t happen very often in our family, so this has been pretty fun. We probably should have put the money into savings, but Grandma and Grandpa would have wanted us to get something like that, right?!

Labor Day Weekend always feels like the end of summer for me, so this weekend we decided to play hard. From Friday to Monday, we watched three movies, ate at three restaurants, went swimming twice and even stayed overnight at a resort. I am exhausted from my relaxing weekend! And since it was the last weekend of summer, I thought about what I did over the past three months to accomplish some specific goals. Just for fun, I counted up some of my activities and, according to my diary entries from Memorial Day to Labor Day, I did the following:

Swimming
I visited the pool 28 times, including 16 visits with my kids, 10 visits on my own to swim laps and two visits with the scouts. Most of the visits were to the South County Outdoor Pool in Riverton, but I also visited the Crestwood Pool in Sandy, the South Jordan Fitness Center and Marv Jenson Recreation Center in South Jordan, Cowabunga Bay in Draper, East Canyon Resort in Henefer, the Hyatt Place in Denver, along with pools at my siblings’ condos and Sherwood Hills Resort in Wellsville.

Hiking
I went on 10 hikes this summer, although a couple would probably be better classified as walks. In June I hiked to Timpanogos Cave with Parley’s fourth grade class and then hiked to the top of Grandeur Peak with my brother Matt, followed by a hike with my brother Dan on the Lake Blanch Trail in Big Cottonwood Canyon. In July, our family hiked on the trail around Payson Lake and then the next weekend, my son Parley joined me on a hike to Dog Lake via Butler Fork. I did a hike every Saturday in August, including a trip to Huber Grove in Midway, a hike with Robin and baby James to Ghost Falls in Corner Canyon, a strenuous climb up to Cardiff Pass in Little Cottonwood Canyon with my brothers Dan and Nate, and a hike to Red Pine Lake with the scouts. The final “hike” was on the trails at the Sherwood Hills Resort yesterday. Good times.

Tennis
Over the past nine years, I have lived very close to a park with a tennis court. I love to play tennis, but since it requires making arrangements with other players, I have seldom played over the past decade. That all changed this summer as I found a couple willing tennis partners and played 15 times, including a couple of games with Parley who got a tennis racquet for his birthday in May.

Golfing
I had intended to play more golf this summer, but time and budget constraints didn’t allow for it. (I was busy doing other things, as you can see.) I did manage to hit a bucket of balls at South Mountain and at Riverbend. I also played a round of golf at Riverbend on July 4th and at Fox Hollow in American Fork last Saturday. Perhaps there’s still time to golf before the season ends.

Camping
We did four camping trips this summer including one night at Payson Lakes in July and one night in Wasatch Mountain State Park in August. The other two were in Riverton – one in our backyard in June (does that count) and the other in the field behind our church in August. (I also camped one night at Potter’s Ponds with the scouts and a night in the dorms at Snow College in Ephraim for youth conference.)

Add to all that jogging with my dog 30 minutes per day, six days per week and I’d say it was a very active summer. I wish I could say that all this physical activity resulted in my losing a bunch of weight, but lamentably, summer BBQs and cold desserts have prevented that. I guess the good news is that I haven’t gained weight; I continue my weigh-ins with my friend Mike and that has helped. I just wish I could get skinny and stay there! Anyway, I am currently forming my game plan for fall/winter physical fitness, which likely will include weight lifting (yuck) and racquetball. We’ll see…

“I was in prison, and ye came unto me…” (Matthew 25:36).

Last Sunday night, four of my friends and I had the chance to present a musical fireside to about 60 inmates at the Utah State Penitentiary. After arriving at the prison, we were directed through various gates, doors and security checkpoints. The high fences topped with barbwire and the other extreme security measures made me think about how grateful I am for my freedom.

As the inmates filed into the small chapel wearing their white jumpsuits, I wasn’t sure how to react. I couldn’t help wondering what crimes each of them had committed to end up in this awful place. And yet they greeted us with friendly smiles and warm handshakes. They were genuinely glad that we had come to visit them. We sang five songs for them in acapella four-part harmony, including “Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing,” “Brightly Beams Our Father’s Mercy,”  “Come, Come Ye Saints,” “Amazing Grace,” and “I Love the Lord.”

Before each song, one of us would take a few minutes to share some thoughts about the song we were about to sing. The spoken word was powerful, but the music is what resonated with those in attendance. We all felt the presence of the Holy Ghost in the room that night bearing witness of the truthfulness of the messages contained in those sacred hymns, especially the messages about Christ’s grace and the power of his redeeming love. Several of the inmates were mouthing the words to the songs we sang. At the end of the program, we invited them to sing “I Know that My Redeemer Lives” and it was amazing to hear all these convicted felons raise their voices in testifying of the reality of the savior Jesus Christ.

At the beginning of the program, I made some opening remarks in which I said something like, “Gentlemen, we’re glad to be here tonight.” However, in my concluding comments, I found myself referring to them as “brethren” instead of “gentlemen.” Something had changed in me. The Spirit had softened my heart and helped me to remember that despite their mistakes, these men are still children of God with great worth. This lesson was made especially poignant for me through an experience that I had during our visit.

I didn’t expect to see any familiar faces in the crowd. But I did. A man sitting in the second row was a former first-grade teacher at my children’s elementary school. Two years ago, he was convicted of multiple counts of child abuse, a situation that shocked, angered and saddened everyone in our neighborhood. Thankfully, my own children were not affected by the actions of this man, but I personally know people who were directly affected by him. And suddenly, I wasn’t just looking into a crowd of anonymous prisoners; I was sharing music and testimony with a man whose choices had seriously impacted people I know and love.

After the fireside, he approached me and we established how we knew one another. In our brief conversation, he shed remorseful tears and asked me to convey his sincere regret for his mistakes to anyone that I might know who may have been affected by him. I told him I would.

This experience taught me two important lessons. First, I was reminded of the fact that we are free to choose our own path in life, but we must accept the consequences of our actions. This man’s choices had resulted in his losing his job, his family, his church membership and his freedom. Even after he has served his time for his crimes, he will be punished by his own regret and by the stigma society places on sex offenders. These consequences will be with him for the rest of his life.

The experience also helped me better understand the power of the Savior’s sacrifice. Even this man can obtain forgiveness and be made whole through the atonement of Jesus Christ. And while it will be a very difficult road to travel for him, Jesus Christ has the power to redeem him. Perhaps some would say he is not worth redeeming, but I believe that the “worth of souls is great in the sight of God” (D&C 18:10). I have faith and hope that Christ can redeem me. “Though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool” (Isaiah 1:18). The saving power of Jesus Christ is real. What hope and joy that brings me!

‘Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her and none else.” (D&C 42:22.)

Those familiar with this scripture in the Doctrine and Covenants of the LDS Church generally think of this in terms of being totally faithful to one’s spouse and reserving physical and emotional intimacy for that person alone. And while I believe that to be a correct interpretation, it is not the only one. I believe it also has something to do with where our priorities are and where our loyalties lie.

Lately, I have been very focused on self improvement. I’ve been trying to lose weight, get in shape and do lots of exercise. I’ve been doing a lot of hiking, jogging, swimming laps and playing tennis. I’ve also been trying to get my spiritual house in order by reading the scriptures more consistently and improving the quality of my personal prayers. I’ve been spending more time with my children, taking them on camping trips and to the swimming pool. I’ve been setting goals in my career and achieving them. I’ve been serving more effectively and faithfully in my church calling. All these things are good. But this weekend, I came to the realization that I have somewhat neglected the most important area of my life — my marriage.

Now, I do not intend to air out any dirty laundry on this blog — that would be inappropriate. Nor is this blog post written in response to some argument or fight Robin and I had over the weekend. No, it’s just that our 12th anniversary is coming up this Saturday and I have been thinking about the incredible journey we’ve shared together over the past dozen years. By in large, our marriage is a very happy one. Robin and I get along well. We rarely fight. We share many of the same goals and work together to raise our four children.

But as I recently looked at my list of goals and plans for improvement, I realized that there wasn’t much on my list that related to improving my marriage — ironic, because I believe that is the most important part of my life. I am coming to understand that if I fail to focus on strengthening our marriage and fulfilling my wife’s needs, I am not following God’s counsel in the scripture quoted above. “Cleaving unto her and to none else” means putting her first in my life — ahead of work, church, career and even our children. Of course, that doesn’t mean those other things aren’t important, or that I can’t have my own hobbies and interests. It doesn’t mean that I have to sacrifice my own goals and plans for self improvement. It’s just that I need to shift my priorities to put our marriage at the very top of the list, ahead of everything else, and change my actions and desires to reflect that.

A friend of mine recently told me that on his wedding day, he promised his wife that his purpose in life was to make her happy every day. Sounds like a sappy newlywed thing, right? But today, 11 years into his marriage, he still stands by that promise and does what he can to fulfill it. He’s not perfect and neither is his marriage. But his top priority and primary goal is to make his wife happy and fulfilled. As the old saying goes, “A happy wife equals a happy life.”

So stay tuned for some thoughts on how to strengthen marriage and feel free to share some of your own!

I’m getting old.

My oldest son Parley Benjamin is a Webelos Scout. He’s 10 years old and he’s in FIFTH grade. My second child, Brianna Nicole, was baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints last weekend. Lily May started kindergarten just a couple of days ago. And baby James is about nine weeks shy of his second birthday!

These milestones really remind me of the rapid passage of time. Gotta make the most of these days while my children are young.

Lily’s first day of kindergarten was on August 4, 2009. She was really ready to start school (and so was Robin). She was even counting down the minutes.

Isn’t that a great smile. Little Lily Lambert is so cute. (I know, I’m biased.)

Brianna was baptized on August 1, 2009. She was a bit ill that day and it made for an exciting morning! She’s such a sweet girl.

Brianna’s baptism was a very special / happy occasion.

Parley and James hanging out in a hammock during a family camp-out to Payson Lakes in July.

Last Friday, I had the opportunity to take my family to the open house for the Oquirrh Mountain Temple, which is just a few minutes from my house. It is a beautiful structure and we had a great experience touring the building. Here are a few photos of the new temple, courtesy of the Deseret News and the LDS Church News.

The new temple is situated on the West bench in the Salt Lake Valley in South Jordan. This picture shows the Oquirrh Mountains in the background (for which the temple was named). It also shows two LDS chapels near the temple. Church buildings which are that close to one another are not uncommon in this area, which is the heartland of the Mormon Church.

This picture shows the Oquirrh Mountain Temple with the Draper temple (dedicated earlier this year) in the background. Utah now has 13 temples, including six within a 30-minute drive from my home in Riverton.

The lower level of the temple features a baptismal font where church members are baptized on behalf of their deceased ancestors. Mormons believe  that those ancestors in the world of spirits can then choose whether to accept that ordinance performed in their behalf. The sculptures of the oxen represent the 12 tribes of Israel.

This grand staircase inside the new temple shows the superb design and workmanship of the edifice.

This is an instruction room where church members learn more about God’s plan of salvation and make promises / covenants with Him to keep His laws.

The Celestial Room (above) symbolically represents entering the presence of God. It is an awe-inspiring room where church members strive to draw closer to Jesus Christ.

Sealing Rooms, like this one inside the new temple,  are rooms where couples can be married / sealed to one another for eternity. Robin and I were sealed in a room like this one in the Salt Lake Temple 12 years ago.

I recently read a blog from a Unitarian Pastor who toured the temple and indicated his surprise at the intimacy of the rooms in the temple. (Few of the rooms have a capacity greater than about 50 people.) Instead of a grand space for worship, like in a cathedral, Mormon temples feature smaller rooms that focus on individual meditation and worship. The blogger discussed the idea of sacred spaces in our lives. For Mormons, like myself, temples represent a place of refuge from our hectic lives, a place to evaluate one’s relationship to God and make plans for improvement. Temples offer a place for peace and serenity in an inspiring setting. What are the sacred places in your life?

(The temple open house continues until Saturday, August 1. After that, it will be closed to the general public. I highly recommend a tour. Reservations can be made by visiting http://www.lds.org/reservations.)

Michael Jackson. Farrah Fawcet. Ed McMahon. Billy Mays. Over the past couple of weeks, we’ve been reminded that celebrities die just like the rest of us.

This year, I have visited eight different cemeteries in the course of my calling as a counselor in the bishopric and as I have sought to honor my own relatives who have passed away. I have been to five funerals/viewings in the past seven months, including three where I sang. I’ve even recently done some banking business with a mortuary in Salt Lake City. So naturally, I have been thinking about the meaning of cemeteries and grave markers. I’ve also been pondering a bit on how I want to be remembered.

Earlier this week at a viewing of a friend’s mother, I saw this quote at a cemetery. I jotted it down because I liked what it said:

“This is a cemetery. Lives are commemorated. Deaths are recorded. Families are reunited. Memories are made tangible and love is undisguised. This is a cemetery. Communities accord respect. Families bestow reverence. Historians seek information and our heritage is thereby enriched. Testimonies of devotion, pride and remembrance are cast in bronze to pay warm tribute to the accomplishments and to the life – not the death of a loved one. A cemetery is a homeland for memorials that are a sustaining source of comfort to the living. A cemetery is a history of people – a perpetual record of yesterday, a sanctuary of peace and quiet today. This cemetery exists because every life is worth loving and remembering always.”

Over Memorial Day Weekend, we took the kids to the Salt Lake Cemetery to visit the graves of some of the prominent leaders in the LDS Church. It turned out to be a bit of a scavenger hunt and we found over half of the gravesites of the 15 deceased church presidents. Here are a few pictures of their graves:

Gordon B. Hinckley, 15th President of LDS Church

Howard W. Hunter, 14th President of the LDS Church

Spencer W. Kimball, 12 President of LDS Church

Harold B. Lee, 11th President of LDS Church

Joseph Fielding Smith, 10th President of LDS Church

David O. Mckay, 9th President of LDS Church

Wilford Woodruff, 4th President of LDS Church

It’s interesting to think of how our loved ones would summarize our lives in a few short words carved into stone or cast into bronze. What would you want your epitaph to say? What are your thoughts on how to remember and honor the dead?