Life-changing Events in Early November

During this first week of November, I have been reflecting on a few life-changing spiritual events that occurred in my life in early November: my baptism, my confirmation and the commencement of my missionary service.

On Friday, November 5, 1982, I was baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Two days later on Sunday November 7, I was confirmed and received the gift of the Holy Ghost in a sacrament meeting. Here are a couple of pictures of my baptism — the first one is of my dad (Kent) and grandma (Dick); the second is of my immediate family on that exciting day back in 1982:

I remember that baptism day very well. I wanted to make sure we performed the ordinance correctly so it wouldn’t have to be repeated. My dad and I were both dressed in white and we rehearsed in another room just before the actual baptism. The water felt very warm and comfortable. After my dad offered the prayer, he immersed my 8-year-old body completely under the water for just a short moment. As I came up out of the water, I felt clean and pure. I made a personal goal at that time that I would never sin again!

While I was unable to keep that goal, it was the beginning of a spiritual journey that led me to missionary service for the Church 11 years later.  On November 3, 1993, I entered the Missionary Training Center in Provo, Utah to prepare for two years of service as a church missionary in Sao Paulo, Brazil. Here’s a picture of my MTC district in front of the Provo Temple (I’m on the far left side):

These events shaped my young life profoundly. My baptism put me on a path of church activity and participation that eventually led me to missionary service. On my mission, I taught the gospel to hundreds of Brazilians and, in the process, became ever-more converted to its truths. My love for and devotion to the Church were cemented during this formative time in my life, for which I am deeply grateful.

On Being 35 Years Old

Today, I turn 35 years old. When I was a boy, that seemed very old. Someday, I’m sure it will seem very young. But for now, it feels just right.

Over the past three Sundays, my kids and I have been watching home videos from years past. They get a kick out of seeing themselves as babies and toddlers. We just watched a video from 2004, way back when I was 30 years old. I haven’t changed much in those five years besides gaining and losing weight (and then gaining and losing it again a couple of times). However, my children have changed a lot. Check out these pictures:

Fall 2004

Fall 2009

Aren’t they cute? My, how they’ve grown!

As I ponder my life, I really do feel 35 years old! I feel like a real adult. I have a wonderful wife who has stood by my side through a dozen years of marriage. I have  two boys, two girls, two cats, a dog, two green cars — a minivan and a Toyota Camry who, between them, have more than 400,000 miles on their odometers. I have owned my first house in Riverton since 2000.

I am the sole breadwinner for five people who depend on me for financial support, as well as emotional support, love, teaching, discipline, etc. I have served as a counselor in the bishopric of my ward for nearly three and a half years, and have had several other callings in the church that have given me great leadership experience and opportunities for service. From 2005 to 2007, I earned an MBA from the University of Utah, and last year I changed careers from marketing / corporate communications to business development / commercial lending.

Yes, I do indeed feel 35 years old. I continue to struggle keeping the weight off since my body thinks it needs the extra storage around the middle in preparation for winter/famine. I can’t stay awake during movies any more, and frequently fall asleep on the sofa around 10:00. I have to wear contact lenses or my vision is blurred. I listen to talk radio and NPR while driving instead of FM music stations, and I know more about popular music from the 90’s than the music from… whatever we’re calling the decade that we’re currently in.

I have a subscription to the Readers’ Digest and to the Deseret News, although I did allow my subscription to the National Geographic to expire. Once or twice I have worn dark socks with shorts, and I confess that I sometimes wear pajama pants and sweatshirts to the grocery store as I pick up my diet soda. I am physically able to grow a decent looking beard, though I seldom have the excuse to do so.

The previous paragraph perhaps makes me sound like I’m older than my 35 years. But 35 is still young. Thankfully, I don’t have much joint or back pain and can run, hike, swim or play tennis and recover fairly quickly. I haven’t been to the doctor in years (though I probably should). I contribute to a 401(K) plan at work, but I don’t pay much attention to the numbers since retirement is at least another lifetime away for me. My hair is just as thick and full as it was when I was in high school and shows no signs receding. I do see an occasional white hair on my head, but it’s more of a curiosity than a cause for concern. My energy level and zest for life are better than ever.

So I’m older than I’ve ever been (I guess we can all say that), but I am content to be where I am. I think that’s the key to happy living. Enjoy the moment you’re in NOW. You can look back at the past with fondness and nostalgia and look forward to exciting things in the future, but if you don’t enjoy the present, you’re not fully living. So I embrace my 35 years and look forward to the next 35!

Beautiful San Francisco

Last month Robin and I celebrated our 12th anniversary and so we decided to take a trip without the kids to San Francisco and the Bay area. Over the past several years, we have tried to have a couples vacation at some point during the year and it’s been very fun. We’ve been on two cruises — one to San Diego, Catalina Island and Ensenada and the other to Miami, Key West and Cozumel. We have also been to San Antonio, Las Vegas and last year we went to New York. We’ve also done some local stays at Little America and the Armstrong Mansion in SLC, the Silver Lake Lodge in Park City and the Homestead in Midway. Thanks to wonderful grandparents, relatives and friends who are willing to help with child care, we have been able to do some fun things together as a couple.

This most recent trip was a blast; here’s a quick summary:

Oakland Temple Grounds and Visitor Center – very beautiful and peaceful; amazing views of the Bay Area.

Berkeley Campus – very busy; didn’t stay long.

Muir Woods – amazing old growth Redwood forest not far from the city.

Stinson Beach – nice views with a fun drive coming and going.

Wicked – excellent musical with great sets, costumes and special effects, a good plot, wonderful acting and singing (note to self: get more sleep the night before; I struggled to stay awake)

Alcatraz – fantastic tour of this famous island/prison; cell house audio tour was a highlight.

Chinatown – lots of fun shopping and dining experiences.

Coit Tower – amazing views of the Bay Area.

Streets – 45 degree angle streets were certainly fun to drive; and a little bit scary.

Ghiradelli Square – lots of tasty, overpriced chocolate.

Fizherman’s Wharf – charming and fun place for a stroll; lots of energy and movement.

The Franciscan Restaurant – excellent food with impressive views of the bay from their wall of glass.

Golden Gate Park – huge park with lots to see and do.

China Camp State Park – old Chinese fishing village; fun to learn about shrimp fishing in the 1800s.

Bodega Bay – beach town where they filmed Alfred Hitchcock’s “The Birds.”

Coast Drive – craggy rocks, crashing waves, very beautiful.

Sonoma Valley – vineyards that go on for miles; charming towns.

We kept the cost of the entire trip to less than $1,000 thanks to a travel voucher from Delta that we earned last year on our trip to New York. It was a great three days to spend together sans kids/distractions. It makes me more grateful for my sweet wife.

Here are some photos:

New iPhone and Bedroom Set

Two weeks ago, I finally gave into and bought an iPhone 3G. I have been wanting one ever since Apple introduced the product in June 2007. But when I realized I could get a refurbished 8 GB 3G for $49 and that the monthly service plan would be discounted by 20% because of my company’s relationship with AT&T, I could resist no longer.

I had very high expectations for this phone and so far it has met or exceeded nearly all of those expectations. I love it. It is a life-changing technology. Just like the DVR which gives users so much more control over their TV viewing, the iPhone revolutionizes the way users access and manage data and entertainment. It is fantastic. For example, the maps feature was invaluable on our recent trip to San Francisco. It helped us know where we were at all times and how to get to where we wanted to go. That feature has already proven very valuable for me as I search for clients’ addresses. I’m working to convert my contacts, calendar and To Do lists over to the phone so I have a quick, searchable way to find important information. The apps I’ve downloaded are very useful and the core functions (iPod, phone and internet / email device) are wonderful.

Two downsides:  the battery life isn’t as good as I had hoped. However, after doing some research, I found out that using the 3G network to download data really eats up the battery charge. So I’ve made a few modifications to how I use the phone. I still have to charge it every night, but that’s because I’m a “power user” and use it a lot. The other struggle is managing my minutes. I selected a plan that was as affordable as possible, but it’s required me to modify my phone usage a bit. I have 900 anytime minutes and unlimited calling on nights and weekends. But with Cricket, my old provider, I had unlimited talk time and I used at least 1500 minutes in a month. I’ve coped with that situation by simply using a landline instead of my cell phone if one is available. And I do look at my online minutes usage record every few days to make sure I’m on track not to exceed my limits. So far I’m doing okay. 

In other news, Robin and I finally decided to buy a bedroom set after 12 years of marriage. We’ve been sleeping on a frame queen bed we inherited from my grandmother and have never had a matching set of furniture. Robin recently received a bit of inheritance money from her grandparents and we decided that instead of frittering it away on small stuff, we’d focus on some larger-ticket items, like this:

It arrives today and we’re excited. We hope that it won’t look too big for our master bedroom, which isn’t huge. We bought a second nightstand, recognizing that it probably won’t fit in the room. We’ll use it when we get a larger house. We would have liked a king bed, but again, we have limited space in the room. And we’ll still be using the same queen mattress and box springs, so no pillow-top mattress for us just yet. All in good time.

Robin also got some new pots and pans for the kitchen and some new light fixtures for the upstairs rooms. A small spending spree doesn’t happen very often in our family, so this has been pretty fun. We probably should have put the money into savings, but Grandma and Grandpa would have wanted us to get something like that, right?!

Whew, what a summer!

Labor Day Weekend always feels like the end of summer for me, so this weekend we decided to play hard. From Friday to Monday, we watched three movies, ate at three restaurants, went swimming twice and even stayed overnight at a resort. I am exhausted from my relaxing weekend! And since it was the last weekend of summer, I thought about what I did over the past three months to accomplish some specific goals. Just for fun, I counted up some of my activities and, according to my diary entries from Memorial Day to Labor Day, I did the following:

Swimming
I visited the pool 28 times, including 16 visits with my kids, 10 visits on my own to swim laps and two visits with the scouts. Most of the visits were to the South County Outdoor Pool in Riverton, but I also visited the Crestwood Pool in Sandy, the South Jordan Fitness Center and Marv Jenson Recreation Center in South Jordan, Cowabunga Bay in Draper, East Canyon Resort in Henefer, the Hyatt Place in Denver, along with pools at my siblings’ condos and Sherwood Hills Resort in Wellsville.

Hiking
I went on 10 hikes this summer, although a couple would probably be better classified as walks. In June I hiked to Timpanogos Cave with Parley’s fourth grade class and then hiked to the top of Grandeur Peak with my brother Matt, followed by a hike with my brother Dan on the Lake Blanch Trail in Big Cottonwood Canyon. In July, our family hiked on the trail around Payson Lake and then the next weekend, my son Parley joined me on a hike to Dog Lake via Butler Fork. I did a hike every Saturday in August, including a trip to Huber Grove in Midway, a hike with Robin and baby James to Ghost Falls in Corner Canyon, a strenuous climb up to Cardiff Pass in Little Cottonwood Canyon with my brothers Dan and Nate, and a hike to Red Pine Lake with the scouts. The final “hike” was on the trails at the Sherwood Hills Resort yesterday. Good times.

Tennis
Over the past nine years, I have lived very close to a park with a tennis court. I love to play tennis, but since it requires making arrangements with other players, I have seldom played over the past decade. That all changed this summer as I found a couple willing tennis partners and played 15 times, including a couple of games with Parley who got a tennis racquet for his birthday in May.

Golfing
I had intended to play more golf this summer, but time and budget constraints didn’t allow for it. (I was busy doing other things, as you can see.) I did manage to hit a bucket of balls at South Mountain and at Riverbend. I also played a round of golf at Riverbend on July 4th and at Fox Hollow in American Fork last Saturday. Perhaps there’s still time to golf before the season ends.

Camping
We did four camping trips this summer including one night at Payson Lakes in July and one night in Wasatch Mountain State Park in August. The other two were in Riverton – one in our backyard in June (does that count) and the other in the field behind our church in August. (I also camped one night at Potter’s Ponds with the scouts and a night in the dorms at Snow College in Ephraim for youth conference.)

Add to all that jogging with my dog 30 minutes per day, six days per week and I’d say it was a very active summer. I wish I could say that all this physical activity resulted in my losing a bunch of weight, but lamentably, summer BBQs and cold desserts have prevented that. I guess the good news is that I haven’t gained weight; I continue my weigh-ins with my friend Mike and that has helped. I just wish I could get skinny and stay there! Anyway, I am currently forming my game plan for fall/winter physical fitness, which likely will include weight lifting (yuck) and racquetball. We’ll see…

“I was in prison, and ye came unto me…”

“I was in prison, and ye came unto me…” (Matthew 25:36).

Last Sunday night, four of my friends and I had the chance to present a musical fireside to about 60 inmates at the Utah State Penitentiary. After arriving at the prison, we were directed through various gates, doors and security checkpoints. The high fences topped with barbwire and the other extreme security measures made me think about how grateful I am for my freedom.

As the inmates filed into the small chapel wearing their white jumpsuits, I wasn’t sure how to react. I couldn’t help wondering what crimes each of them had committed to end up in this awful place. And yet they greeted us with friendly smiles and warm handshakes. They were genuinely glad that we had come to visit them. We sang five songs for them in acapella four-part harmony, including “Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing,” “Brightly Beams Our Father’s Mercy,”  “Come, Come Ye Saints,” “Amazing Grace,” and “I Love the Lord.”

Before each song, one of us would take a few minutes to share some thoughts about the song we were about to sing. The spoken word was powerful, but the music is what resonated with those in attendance. We all felt the presence of the Holy Ghost in the room that night bearing witness of the truthfulness of the messages contained in those sacred hymns, especially the messages about Christ’s grace and the power of his redeeming love. Several of the inmates were mouthing the words to the songs we sang. At the end of the program, we invited them to sing “I Know that My Redeemer Lives” and it was amazing to hear all these convicted felons raise their voices in testifying of the reality of the savior Jesus Christ.

At the beginning of the program, I made some opening remarks in which I said something like, “Gentlemen, we’re glad to be here tonight.” However, in my concluding comments, I found myself referring to them as “brethren” instead of “gentlemen.” Something had changed in me. The Spirit had softened my heart and helped me to remember that despite their mistakes, these men are still children of God with great worth. This lesson was made especially poignant for me through an experience that I had during our visit.

I didn’t expect to see any familiar faces in the crowd. But I did. A man sitting in the second row was a former first-grade teacher at my children’s elementary school. Two years ago, he was convicted of multiple counts of child abuse, a situation that shocked, angered and saddened everyone in our neighborhood. Thankfully, my own children were not affected by the actions of this man, but I personally know people who were directly affected by him. And suddenly, I wasn’t just looking into a crowd of anonymous prisoners; I was sharing music and testimony with a man whose choices had seriously impacted people I know and love.

After the fireside, he approached me and we established how we knew one another. In our brief conversation, he shed remorseful tears and asked me to convey his sincere regret for his mistakes to anyone that I might know who may have been affected by him. I told him I would.

This experience taught me two important lessons. First, I was reminded of the fact that we are free to choose our own path in life, but we must accept the consequences of our actions. This man’s choices had resulted in his losing his job, his family, his church membership and his freedom. Even after he has served his time for his crimes, he will be punished by his own regret and by the stigma society places on sex offenders. These consequences will be with him for the rest of his life.

The experience also helped me better understand the power of the Savior’s sacrifice. Even this man can obtain forgiveness and be made whole through the atonement of Jesus Christ. And while it will be a very difficult road to travel for him, Jesus Christ has the power to redeem him. Perhaps some would say he is not worth redeeming, but I believe that the “worth of souls is great in the sight of God” (D&C 18:10). I have faith and hope that Christ can redeem me. “Though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they are red as crimson, they shall be like wool” (Isaiah 1:18). The saving power of Jesus Christ is real. What hope and joy that brings me!

Cleave Unto Her and None Else

‘Thou shalt love thy wife with all thy heart, and shalt cleave unto her and none else.” (D&C 42:22.)

Those familiar with this scripture in the Doctrine and Covenants of the LDS Church generally think of this in terms of being totally faithful to one’s spouse and reserving physical and emotional intimacy for that person alone. And while I believe that to be a correct interpretation, it is not the only one. I believe it also has something to do with where our priorities are and where our loyalties lie.

Lately, I have been very focused on self improvement. I’ve been trying to lose weight, get in shape and do lots of exercise. I’ve been doing a lot of hiking, jogging, swimming laps and playing tennis. I’ve also been trying to get my spiritual house in order by reading the scriptures more consistently and improving the quality of my personal prayers. I’ve been spending more time with my children, taking them on camping trips and to the swimming pool. I’ve been setting goals in my career and achieving them. I’ve been serving more effectively and faithfully in my church calling. All these things are good. But this weekend, I came to the realization that I have somewhat neglected the most important area of my life — my marriage.

Now, I do not intend to air out any dirty laundry on this blog — that would be inappropriate. Nor is this blog post written in response to some argument or fight Robin and I had over the weekend. No, it’s just that our 12th anniversary is coming up this Saturday and I have been thinking about the incredible journey we’ve shared together over the past dozen years. By in large, our marriage is a very happy one. Robin and I get along well. We rarely fight. We share many of the same goals and work together to raise our four children.

But as I recently looked at my list of goals and plans for improvement, I realized that there wasn’t much on my list that related to improving my marriage — ironic, because I believe that is the most important part of my life. I am coming to understand that if I fail to focus on strengthening our marriage and fulfilling my wife’s needs, I am not following God’s counsel in the scripture quoted above. “Cleaving unto her and to none else” means putting her first in my life — ahead of work, church, career and even our children. Of course, that doesn’t mean those other things aren’t important, or that I can’t have my own hobbies and interests. It doesn’t mean that I have to sacrifice my own goals and plans for self improvement. It’s just that I need to shift my priorities to put our marriage at the very top of the list, ahead of everything else, and change my actions and desires to reflect that.

A friend of mine recently told me that on his wedding day, he promised his wife that his purpose in life was to make her happy every day. Sounds like a sappy newlywed thing, right? But today, 11 years into his marriage, he still stands by that promise and does what he can to fulfill it. He’s not perfect and neither is his marriage. But his top priority and primary goal is to make his wife happy and fulfilled. As the old saying goes, “A happy wife equals a happy life.”

So stay tuned for some thoughts on how to strengthen marriage and feel free to share some of your own!

Milestones

I’m getting old.

My oldest son Parley Benjamin is a Webelos Scout. He’s 10 years old and he’s in FIFTH grade. My second child, Brianna Nicole, was baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints last weekend. Lily May started kindergarten just a couple of days ago. And baby James is about nine weeks shy of his second birthday!

These milestones really remind me of the rapid passage of time. Gotta make the most of these days while my children are young.

Lily’s first day of kindergarten was on August 4, 2009. She was really ready to start school (and so was Robin). She was even counting down the minutes.

Isn’t that a great smile. Little Lily Lambert is so cute. (I know, I’m biased.)

Brianna was baptized on August 1, 2009. She was a bit ill that day and it made for an exciting morning! She’s such a sweet girl.

Brianna’s baptism was a very special / happy occasion.

Parley and James hanging out in a hammock during a family camp-out to Payson Lakes in July.

Oquirrh Mountain Temple

Last Friday, I had the opportunity to take my family to the open house for the Oquirrh Mountain Temple, which is just a few minutes from my house. It is a beautiful structure and we had a great experience touring the building. Here are a few photos of the new temple, courtesy of the Deseret News and the LDS Church News.

The new temple is situated on the West bench in the Salt Lake Valley in South Jordan. This picture shows the Oquirrh Mountains in the background (for which the temple was named). It also shows two LDS chapels near the temple. Church buildings which are that close to one another are not uncommon in this area, which is the heartland of the Mormon Church.

This picture shows the Oquirrh Mountain Temple with the Draper temple (dedicated earlier this year) in the background. Utah now has 13 temples, including six within a 30-minute drive from my home in Riverton.

The lower level of the temple features a baptismal font where church members are baptized on behalf of their deceased ancestors. Mormons believe  that those ancestors in the world of spirits can then choose whether to accept that ordinance performed in their behalf. The sculptures of the oxen represent the 12 tribes of Israel.

This grand staircase inside the new temple shows the superb design and workmanship of the edifice.

This is an instruction room where church members learn more about God’s plan of salvation and make promises / covenants with Him to keep His laws.

The Celestial Room (above) symbolically represents entering the presence of God. It is an awe-inspiring room where church members strive to draw closer to Jesus Christ.

Sealing Rooms, like this one inside the new temple,  are rooms where couples can be married / sealed to one another for eternity. Robin and I were sealed in a room like this one in the Salt Lake Temple 12 years ago.

I recently read a blog from a Unitarian Pastor who toured the temple and indicated his surprise at the intimacy of the rooms in the temple. (Few of the rooms have a capacity greater than about 50 people.) Instead of a grand space for worship, like in a cathedral, Mormon temples feature smaller rooms that focus on individual meditation and worship. The blogger discussed the idea of sacred spaces in our lives. For Mormons, like myself, temples represent a place of refuge from our hectic lives, a place to evaluate one’s relationship to God and make plans for improvement. Temples offer a place for peace and serenity in an inspiring setting. What are the sacred places in your life?

(The temple open house continues until Saturday, August 1. After that, it will be closed to the general public. I highly recommend a tour. Reservations can be made by visiting http://www.lds.org/reservations.)

Remembering the Dead

Michael Jackson. Farrah Fawcet. Ed McMahon. Billy Mays. Over the past couple of weeks, we’ve been reminded that celebrities die just like the rest of us.

This year, I have visited eight different cemeteries in the course of my calling as a counselor in the bishopric and as I have sought to honor my own relatives who have passed away. I have been to five funerals/viewings in the past seven months, including three where I sang. I’ve even recently done some banking business with a mortuary in Salt Lake City. So naturally, I have been thinking about the meaning of cemeteries and grave markers. I’ve also been pondering a bit on how I want to be remembered.

Earlier this week at a viewing of a friend’s mother, I saw this quote at a cemetery. I jotted it down because I liked what it said:

“This is a cemetery. Lives are commemorated. Deaths are recorded. Families are reunited. Memories are made tangible and love is undisguised. This is a cemetery. Communities accord respect. Families bestow reverence. Historians seek information and our heritage is thereby enriched. Testimonies of devotion, pride and remembrance are cast in bronze to pay warm tribute to the accomplishments and to the life – not the death of a loved one. A cemetery is a homeland for memorials that are a sustaining source of comfort to the living. A cemetery is a history of people – a perpetual record of yesterday, a sanctuary of peace and quiet today. This cemetery exists because every life is worth loving and remembering always.”

Over Memorial Day Weekend, we took the kids to the Salt Lake Cemetery to visit the graves of some of the prominent leaders in the LDS Church. It turned out to be a bit of a scavenger hunt and we found over half of the gravesites of the 15 deceased church presidents. Here are a few pictures of their graves:

Gordon B. Hinckley, 15th President of LDS Church

Howard W. Hunter, 14th President of the LDS Church

Spencer W. Kimball, 12 President of LDS Church

Harold B. Lee, 11th President of LDS Church

Joseph Fielding Smith, 10th President of LDS Church

David O. Mckay, 9th President of LDS Church

 

Wilford Woodruff, 4th President of LDS Church

It’s interesting to think of how our loved ones would summarize our lives in a few short words carved into stone or cast into bronze. What would you want your epitaph to say? What are your thoughts on how to remember and honor the dead?

Pessimism or Optimism?

My cousin recently blogged about how she is extremely optimistic and pessimistic at the same time about world events. She specifically discussed the recent election protests in Iran and the possibility of change coming to that country. She said she feels hopeful and fearful at the same time. My cousin and I both grew up when the Iron Curtain seemed impenetrable, when the Soviet Union was the evil empire full of our enemies. And then change came to their country, almost overnight. So it will be fascinating to see what happens in Iran…

Like my cousin, I also feel tremendous pessimism and optimism about the world and its future. For example, I am unsure what to believe about our American economy and system of government. On one hand, I want very much for President Obama to succeed and to see our nation prosper economically. I want to see positive changes to our health care system. At the same time, I am quite concerned about government intervention and the massive expansion we’ve been witnessing. As one commentator put it recently, Obama wants us to believe that the recent enormous government spending and intrusion into the free markets was necessary to save our system. Perhaps the truth is that the recession was the excuse President Obama needed to transform our government/economy into a much more European-like system, where government entitlements are widespread and where the government controls much more of the free markets, making them much less free, and consequently, less efficient.

(Some would suggest that a similar situation occurred when George W. Bush used 9-11 as an excuse to invade Iraq and remove Saddam from power, something Bush really wanted to do anyway but needed an excuse to do it, even though no direct link between 9-11 and Iraq ever existed.)

Anyway, the strange thing about this mix of fear and hope is that they can somehow co-exist in us. I fear a lot of things: Will I die young like my father? Will I get diabetes, heart disease and cancer like many of my relatives? How could I ever recover if I lost one of my children? How could I go on if my sweet wife were taken from me? I don’t like to dwell on these thoughts too much since they just make me expend energy unnecessarily by pondering “what if” scenarios.

A part of me fears the world that my children will have to face with its increasing moral degeneracy; at the same time, I look forward to the future with great anticipation. There are so many great things are ahead of us; new technologies, new ideas, new works of art and entertainment. Some people see the world as getting worse and worse every day. I choose to see it as continually improving in many ways. Certainly, more and more are choosing unrighteous paths and sin is becoming increasingly acceptable. But many are also deepening their devotion to Jesus Christ and his teachings and living better lives than ever before.

So, are you pessimistic or optimistic? Which is better: a healthy pessimism that grounds you in reality and keeps you from being disillusioned or optimism that makes you see the world through rose-colored glasses, but also could be setting you up for eventual disappointment?

Living in the Moment

My brother-in-law Chris recently blogged about an intriguing idea. In his essay he explored the idea that having a finite period of time in this mortal existence impacts how we live and what we focus on. He suggests that the impermanence of life affects how we perceive things and informs our choices and our actions.

Why does the fragility of this impermanent mortal existence make life more special? Chris talks about how real flowers have more value than fake flowers since there is a temporary quality to them that demands to be enjoyed in this moment since their beauty will soon fade. Similarly, a gorgeous sunset or a beautiful rainbow are short-lived, and would not be nearly as special if they were always there. The fact that these displays of nature last for just a few fleeting moments adds to their charm.

When my dad was told he had six months to live, I often thought about what I would do given a similar prognosis. It certainly would depend on my health (my dad was seriously ill during his final months), but I think I’d focus on deepening relationships and creating shared experiences together. The fact that we knew our time together was so limited made those final months extra special.

Of course, I believe in the eternal nature of the soul. My faith teaches that progression is eternal and that family relationships can continue beyond the grave. I believe that someday after I die, my body will be resurrected to a perfect and immortal state. That belief provides me with comfort and peace, and gives my life much more meaning and purpose. I believe the purpose of life is to gain experience, intelligence and relationships. Those are the things we’ll take with us when we go. But I don’t like to live my life and make choices based solely on expectations of future glory. I follow Christian teachings because I believe them to be the blueprint of happiness and peace in THIS life.

(Side note: sometimes when I do the dishes or help Robin put away the groceries or lug 40-pound bags of salt down the stairs to the water softener, I ask myself, “Will I be doing these mundane tasks for eternity?” I certainly hope not. To be honest, the thought of living forever has always made me a bit queasy, mostly because of my aversion to repetition. Even if we are doing amazing things each day as exalted beings, wouldn’t it get old after a while? I don’t like to think about it too long because my finite mind cannot comprehend the infinite. Even my daughter Brianna told me once that thinking about living forever makes her “tummy feel kind of weird.”)

Anyway, my point is that my belief in eternal life does impact my choices, but having a finite period of time to do things in this life also affects my actions. The fact that my children are growing up and that their childhood is fleeting makes me want to spend more time with them. It makes me want to cherish the present moment. When we know something will NOT last forever (rainbow, sunset, freshly cut flowers, time with a terminally ill parent, our children’s childhood), it becomes that much more precious to us.

I am not suggesting that we “eat, drink and be merry for tomorrow we die.” I am suggesting that while we look forward to eternal life with excitement and great anticipation, we should never forget to have joy in the journey — TODAY. Remember that scene from “Dead Poets’ Society” where Robin Williams’ character tells the boys “Seize the day, boys, make your lives extraordinary.”

Carpe Diem!

Can I PLEASE have a new iPhone?

Apple has done it again — they have created something that I REALLY want. I have been coveting an iPhone since June 2007 when it was first released. Back then it cost $499 for the 4 GB version and $599 for the 8 GB version. Today, the faster 3G 8 GB version costs $99. Yes, that’s only $99 bucks. They recently slashed the price and I am sorely tempted to buy one!

They also are about to introduce an even cooler version — the iPhone 3G S, which costs $199 for the 16 GB version and $299 for the 32 GB version of the amazing phone. What a deal! And look at all the cool new features:

• Video camera with editing capabilities
• A 3-megapixel digital camera
• Voice memo recording
• Internet tethering (hook it up to your laptop for internet access)
• Compass and GPS
• Voice control (tell your iPhone what you want to do and wallah!)
• A ton of really cool apps that you can download (many for free)
• Great internet service, email, texting
• A really cool phone with great contact management
• Oh yeah, it’s also an iPod, so you can listen to all your music, buy music directly from iTunes, as well as watch videos from YouTube or movies that you have purchased or converted from DVD.

Today while helping out on a school field trip, I was carrying around my iPod, a cell phone and a digital camera and I thought: “I could have these all in one…” Needless to say, I REALLY want one. I love the technology. I love the features. I love being connected. So why don’t I just go out and buy one already!? Here’s why:

1. Price. The initial price of $99 is really good. But the true cost is more like $2,500. About $100 per month for AT&T service on a 24-month contract. And although my company would reimburse much of that cost, $100 per month for a phone is just too much. I’m too cheap.

2. Being connected. Do I really need to be connected everywhere at every moment? Should I be blogging, emailing, texting, twittering or Facebooking while I drive, eat lunch or take my kids to the park. No, probably not. I spend too much time on the internet as it is.

3. I already have a laptop and with wireless broadband throughout my house. While the keyboard on the iPhone is nice, it’s so much faster to get work done on a REAL keyboard. Short Facebook status updates are okay, but blogging, email and writing documents on that tiny keyboard is still quite slow – although it’s faster than tapping out text messages on my cell!

4. I already own an iPod Touch, which is like an iPhone without the phone or camera. It’s a great device and can connect to my home wireless network so I can check email and Facebook without having to fire up my desktop computer or laptop. I recently downloaded some software updates that allowed me to put “apps” on my iPod Touch, so I can now read the scriptures, download and listen to podcasts or watch YouTube videos right on that little device. The touch screen is awesome — it’s the best iPod I’ve ever owned.

I believe that someday I will have an iPhone or something like it. But that day has not yet arrived, even though I wish were here!

Amusing Kiddie Quotes

Here are a few amusing quotes from my four children:

Parley, 10-year-old son.
“Dad, I think God must be right-handed.” (We had just been reading the scriptures together as a family and we had read about how the righteous would be on the right hand of God and how the sheep (righteous) were on the right and the goats (wicked) were on the left.)

Brianna, almost 8-year-old daughter.
“Dad, whenever I think about living forever, I get this kind of sick feeling in my tummy. I think I’ll get bored after a while. Do you think that once we make it to the Celestial Kingdom, we’ll be able to visit Disneyworld and Hawaii whenever we want?” (This conversation was initiated by Brianna, not me, while we were driving alone together in the car.)

“Mom, I really want to go to bed because my left eye is feeling kind of sleepy. But my right eye is still kind of awake.”

Lily, 5-year-old daughter.
Lily: “Dad, I want to buy a treat at the store.”
Dad:  “Lily, we can’t because we don’t have any money.”
Lily: “That’s okay, we can just use the credit card!”

James, 20-month old son.
Pointing to an elephant, he exclaimed excitedly: “Gog!” (his word for dog).

First Haircut for Baby James

I’ve been resisting it for 19 months now because his baby hair was so cute, but it finally came time for James to get a haircut. So on Saturday, I took the boys over the the “haircut store” to take care of business.

James was a little squirmy at first and didn’t want to wear the smock. I had to pin his arms to his side. Unfortunately, it was a fairly traumatic experience for the little fellow — especially when the lady used the electric clippers on him — he was terrified!

We tried to calm him down by feeding him some Smarties provided by the salon, but it didn’t help much. His tears and slobber from the candy got all over the smock.

He finally calmed down when he started watching Parley get his hair cut in the next chair over. And now his beautiful golden brown hair with a hint of curl now lies in a dumpster somewhere behind the salon.

Of course, Parley doesn’t look too thrilled about getting his hair cut either. But at least there were no tears and I didn’t have to hold him down!

Pre-school Graduation

Yesterday, five-year old Lily “graduated” from pre-school. (That sounds a little funny to me. Did she pass all her tests and complete all her coursework and rent a cap and gown? Uh, no.) Anyway, perhaps “completed” pre-school would be a better way to describe it. She did get a little “diploma” after the kids in her class gave a really cute 30-minute program, which I’m glad I did not miss. The teacher even played “Pomp and Circumstance” on her iPod; very fun. Here are a few cute pictures:

Lily is a really unique little person. She has always had a very fun-loving, sweet and strong personality. Of all my children, I think she has the most potential to become a performer. She has a certain stage presence and she thrives on getting attention (remind you of anyone?) To celebrate her accomplishment, I took her to the store with me and bought her some gum, which is a lot cheaper than an iPod or a trip abroad that she’ll want at later graduations.

Pre-school has been really great for our children. My parents-in-law have paid the tuition for all three of our children who have attended pre-school, which has been wonderful. It would have been hard for us to afford it with all the other things that compete for our money! Pre-school has been a great blessing in their lives. We could have taught Lily most of what she learned in class here at home. But pre-school gave her a great social outlet and it gave Robin a much-needed break.

I already did a nostalgia post with Bye Bye Binkie, so I won’t go into the mixed emotions I feel as another one of my children completes pre-school and gets ready to start Kindergarten. Suffice it to say that I’m very grateful to have these little people in my life. I’m a very lucky (blessed) man.

Here’s a cute picture of me with my girls.

Confessions of a Trekkie

In my last post I discussed my interest in the pop culture phenomenon that is Star Trek. With 11 films grossing over $1 Billion, six TV series with over 700 total episodes, plus dozens of novels, books on tape, fan fiction and merchandise, the 40+ year franchise is alive and strong.

Here are a few reasons why I like Star Trek:

1. Science  – I love astronomy. Stars. Planets. Moos. Nebulae. Black Holes. It’s all very cool. I have always been fascinated by the natural world and the universe. Many of the plots of Star Trek shows are very scientific. Yes, there’s a lot of science fiction there too, but it’s fun to have a show at least loosely based on real science.

2. Technology – From extremely advanced medical innovations to traveling at “warp” speed to transporter technology (i.e. “beam me up”), technology on Star Trek has always fascinated me. Imagine being able to cure a fatal disease with a simple medical tri-corder or being able to travel faster than the speed of light to visit new parts of the galaxy. What would transporter technology do to our society if it were real. Can you imagine “beaming” to Hawaii for an afternoon on the beach? And some technology seems to have become a reality — wireless flip phones…

3. Exploration – I am a very curious person. I want to learn everything I can about many different subjects. The idea of having a starship whose primary purpose is to expand knowledge is quite appealing. Plus, I love to explore new areas. And while my day to day exploration may be limited to trying out a different jogging trail from time to time, I have a lot of wanderlust and I love seeing new places. Star Trek takes me to places that I cannot go (yes, they’re fictional places, but they are still very fun to visit.)

4. Optimism – The Star Trek universe provides a very optimistic vision of the future. In this vision of the 24th Century, mankind has overcome war and poverty. Disease has largely been eradicated and the entire planet is united in peace and prosperity. Exploration of the universe and mutually beneficial relationships with other lifeforms are prized above all else.

5. Oh, and I also like the action, the explosions, the fights, the villians, etc. I don’t care much for Klingons but I love the Borg, and I really like the Harogens, a brutal space-faring species that harvests organs from weaker lifeforms (as seen in episodes of the series Star Trek Voyager). Nothing like a good monster/villian for good entertainment.

Anyway, that’s what I like about Star Trek. I’ll continue to watch it, but don’t worry, I won’t be buying any pointy ears anytime soon.

Great Trekspectations

Okay, so I stole that headline from the Deseret News which reviewed the new Star Trek movie, but it described my great interest in and excitement for the new film.

There are only a few movies that I see in the nice theaters (I usually wait for the dollar theater or DVD) and even fewer that I HAVE to see on opening night. But Star Trek is one of them.

I admit it. I’m a fan. I have never been to a convention and do not own any pointy ears, Star Trek uniforms or phasers.  But I have watched all 10 previous Star Trek movies at least twice each –  a few of them I have watched even more than that. I can even name all of their titles in order without looking it up:

Star Trek: The Motion Picture
Star Trek: The Wrath of Kahn
Star Trek: The Search for Spock
Star Trek: The Voyage Home
Star Trek: The Final Frontier
Star Trek: The Undiscovered Country
Star Trek: Generations
Star Trek: First Contact
Star Trek: Insurrection
Star Trek: Nemesis

My favorites are “The Wrath of Kahn,” “The Voyage Home” (the one with the whales) and “First Contact” (the one with the Borg taking over the Enterprise). The worst were The Motion Picture and The Final Frontier. The rest were good, but not great.

I’ve watched a good number of episodes from the six television series, especially “The Next Generation” and “Voyager.” I never really got into Deep Space Nine or Enterprise. And, interestingly, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a complete episode of Star Trek: The Original Series. So again, I guess I’m not what you’d consider a hard core fan. My favorite Trek series is Voyager. At first I thought it was really PC to have a woman captain, a Native American first officer and a black Vulcan security officer (or should I say African American Vulcan… but wait, if he’s Vulcan, how can he be American or African… I’m so confused). However, interesting story lines and good character development kept me coming back to Voyager. Robin enjoyed it too so we watched many episodes together back in the early 2000s.

I’ve been anticipating this latest film now for many years. The last Trek film was released in 2002 and didn’t get particularly good audience reception, so Star Trek has been on hiatus. Until now. The eleventh film titled simply “Star Trek” is a complete reboot of the franchise. Helmed by LOST creator J.J. Abrams, this new film boldly goes where Star Trek hasn’t gone before. And it left my wife Robin and me totally satisfied and looking forward to future sequels.

It was a fast-paced, action-packed thrill ride that has a universal appeal to both long-time fans and people who have never heard the Vulcan phrase, “Live long and prosper.” There was quite a bit of humor in the film and several references that paid homage to the other films and TV series which delighted fans but were subtle enough not to leave non-fans out of the fun. The actors were great and the special effects were spectacular without being overdone. (i.e. George Lucas in Star Wars Episodes I, II and III.) The film sets the stage for many more excellent adventures which we will look forward to watching.

So why do I like Star Trek? I will address that question in my next post, so stay tuned.

Kids Say the Darnest Things!

On Saturday afternoon, my seven-year old daughter Brianna and I were on a date when we saw an incredibly brilliant rainbow. We were both really awed by it and both of us wanted to express our excitement. She said to me something like this: “Dad, that rainbow is so beautiful, do you think it would be okay to use the Lord’s name in vain?” Surprised by her innocent inquiry, I said that even though it was really impressive, we shouldn’t use that word in an exclamation. She agreed and then said “Oh my gosh, that’s beautiful.”

Later on we were at a restaurant enjoying a pizza buffet to celebrate Lily’s birthday. An extremely overweight man was loading his plate up with pizza and salad. Five-year-old Lily, who was within three feet of him, pointed at him repeatedly and exclaimed, “Dad, he’s fat!” a couple of times. Needless to say, I quickly ushered her out of the restaurant, my face red and my eyes on the ground.

I Love These Kids!

These little guys bring us so much frustration and so much joy!! I’d do anything for them.

(Robin says James got jipped on this photo shoot; the older kids got pictures on Easter when they were looking good. James had just woken up from a nap.)